Deseret Bomb

I received in the mail today the current Deseret Book (bookstore owned by the LDS church)catalog. Before I threw it in Alison's recycling box (which will soon be recycled itself), I decided to peruse the selections. That's when I saw the sad, sad, sad, sad, utterly depressing state of LDS fiction. Let's reframe that: That's when I saw the glorious future of LDS unintentional comedy. What I saw was the blurb for "Abinadi". I encourage you to follow the hyperlink so that you can read LuAnn's sparkling review. If you decide not to, here's the blurb:

"Raquel has a secret. As the daughter of one of King Noah’s
priests, she enjoys a luxurious life and the admiration of powerful men. But her
heart belongs to a commoner, a man with no earthly wealth but rich heavenly
gifts. When King Noah demands that Raquel join his harem, she flees the only
life she has known and marries her secret love. His name is Abinadi.

The couple finds abundant joy in their community of believers and in their firstborn
son. But when the Lord calls Abinadi as His prophet, their faith is tested to
the outermost limits. Abinadi’s commitment to the Lord requires them both to
give their all—even unto death. Yet if Alma, the newest priest in King Noah’s
court, chooses to overcome his troubled past and cleave unto the truth, their
sacrifice may yield rich fruit.

With vivid detail and poignant emotion, this
historical novel pulls readers into a fiery tale of love, courage, and faith
that is difficult to put down and impossible to forget."

This is for real. Imagine the doors that this book opens. Here's my own poorly thought out plot for some young adult fiction:

"Teenage Moses and Aaron become tired of the Pharaoh's strict ways and decide to play some pranks. Hilarity ensues as they perform hijinks around the royal palace. When the Pharaoh grounds them in order to get some peace and quiet, the two boys set sail on a memorable rafting trip down the Nile. Will they make it back in time to take their Egyptian dates to MORP?"

Does this plot seem as terrible as it would have had you not just read about "Abinadi"?

I just deleted a bunch of stuff that I had written here because what I really want to say is that it is an obviously terrible idea to write alternative plots to Book of Mormon stories and pretend that they're worth reading when they're truly absurd - just like it is a terrible idea to let otherwise reputable recording artists make Christmas albums and pretend that the music that they make is worth hearing when it's sounds hardly better than a hobo band.

Where's Brandon?

A)
B)
C)D)

A) Behind the bed
B) In the hot tub, that was was too easy.
C) He's not in this one. That was a trick.
D) By the TV cabinet

P.S Dad, these are pics from the timeshare condo (picture a is the 2nd bedroom and pictures b and c are of the master bedroom). If you can't tell, it was pretty nice! Thanks for sharing...see you on Wednesday!

P.P.S Brandon and I think these pictures are hilarious.

P.P.S.S We went to Orlando a few weeks ago and had soooo much fun. When we get around to it, we'll post pictures of our trip to Disney's Magic Kingdom (which was seriously so awesome).

The Magic of the Season

Just because it's cold outside (and it has been very cold in Denver), doesn't mean that we can't all feel love. This is a picture that I found in an email sent to me. It completely reflects the beauty and warmth that this season brings out in people. Long live the Arctic Sorceress.

Happy Holidays!!

Below is the Christmas E-Letter we sent out to some of our family and friends. Sorry if you have already seen this! Unfortunately, this version doesn't have the ultra cliche Christmas tree border around the text. I couldn't figure out how to import files made in Publisher.

December 14, 2008

Dear Family and Friends,

We always love getting Christmas cards and letters but haven’t known how to contribute to the annual parade of friend and family updates in a way that wouldn’t bore everyone to tears since we don’t have kids to show off. So after being inspired by a slew of e-Holiday Letters that made this process seem both low key and affordable, here’s our 1st an-nual holiday letter, complete with a cheesy Christmas tree border (and we’re not yet sure if either the border or this letter is for better or for worse)!

2008 started off when the Jeopardy! folks called Brandon with an invi-tation to be on the show. Brandon was so excited that Alison almost gave him a paper bag to hyperventilate in. We flew out to California for a taping where he ended up doing a fantastic job by coming in sec-ond to a brilliant nerd that was essentially bred to be on the show. The whole experience was exciting not only because it was an opportu-nity to win money and be on TV, but because it was a celebration that Brandon was chosen to be on a show he has always enjoyed. So, if you keep your eye out, you might see him on a Jeopardy rerun!

Spring was characterized by an inordinate amount of school work for both of us as we each finished our semesters for our respective gradu-ate school programs. In June, however, Alison received her Masters in Social Work from the University of Denver. While she hasn’t yet been forgiven for making the family sit through the long procession, she was thrilled to graduate and continues to ‘gently’ remind Brandon that she is the Master of the house, not him.

Since the onset of summer, the months have flown by…mainly because Brandon started the rotations that comprise his final year of pharmacy school (he’ll be graduating in May!) and works part-time as a pharmacy intern. Alison also started her first real job with her hard earned Mas-ters as an in-home family therapist. So in the midst of everything, we find ourselves busy but fortunate to be immersed in activities we both enjoy and have had our hearts set on doing.
We have topped the year off with the decision for Brandon to do a pharmacy residency. While we are unsure where this will take us, we are confident that this will be a great and fulfilling career move for Brandon.

We have fortunately managed to travel beyond the streets of Denver by taking some short trips to Rocky Point, Mexico; Moab, Utah; San Clemente, California; Rocky Mountain N ational Park, Colorado; and Orlando, Florida. We keep trying to remind ourselves that we work-to-live and not the other way around.

Hopefully this letter wasn’t too obnoxious; mostly we wanted to say hello to those we love and let you know that you all are frequently in our thoughts, memories, and even prayers.
May the holiday season and New Year bring you comfort and joy.

Love,

Brandon and Alison

Our Year in Pictures...





Clockwise from Above: Arches, UT; Disney’s Magic Kingdom; Fall leaves in the Rocky Mtns; top of Mt. Evans (14. 000 ft!).

Make it a Double

Rachel Ray eat your heart out. Welcome to your first peek at the culinary revolution that I started. To my knowledge, I'm the first person ever to make a double hot dog. Why no one has extended the concept of double hamburgers to hot dogs is unclear to me, but it was obviously long overdue.

Undefeated

Thank you Max Hall.

Stuff I'm Sure You Really Want to Know

Last year, around this time, we bought a queen-sized down comforter because we had been sharing a twin-sized one and it just wasn't working out. We had only been married for a few months and hadn't fully settled in. And you'll have to remember that I pretty much get used to inconvenience at a lightening quick speed (remember this and this?). I suppose we got serious about getting a bigger comforter when we could no longer deny that a.) twin-sized bedding is only meant for one person and b.) I am a cocoon sleeper and wrap myself up real tight in my blankets while I sleep. I guess I just like to be as snug as a bug in a rug. Unfortunately, that always left Brandon shivering in the night and kind of irritated in the morning.

Well, here we are, more than a year later and I have made even more progress. I finally bought a duvet cover for the comforter!! Note the double exclamation point? It is a big deal--I finally moved from the thinking-about-it to the doing-something-about-it stage! Given my major procrastination issues, sometimes I am amazed that I have a masters and real job.

In a typical Alison fashion, buying a duvet cover has been one of the biggest pains ever. So many rhetorical questions I can never fully answer! Is it too much? If I made one would it be less expensive? Does that material look cheap? Is it too girly? Will I like it in 6 months let alone 5 years? Will it be too heavy and make us hot? You see how difficult those questions are? I guess that is why I left them unanswered for an entire year.

I decided that things must change when I noticed I was grimacing when I climbed into bed, annoyed that our giant dry-clean-only comforter was now a dull white with some unsightly stains (why oh why don't I take off mascara before I go to bed?). Not a good way to beckon sleep.

So where did I find the perfect one? On overstock.com. I've never seen it in person, haven't felt the fabric, don't think it is a trusted brand, and saw an image of it for the first time tonight. Does that mean it is just that awesome? No, not really. It just means I got so sick of not having one that I became impulsive and enticed by the $2.95 flat shipping.

But it looks promising, right?
I ordered the mocha colored one. Neutral but not too boring. Actually, they didn't have any of the other colors in stock. See, I told you I acted impulsively.

In other news, I did not buy these plates at TJ Maxx tonight.
I really really wanted to though. They made me nostalgic for Christmas at home since both my Grandma and my mom have these plates. However, since I already have a Christmas china pattern and have about three other non-Christmas plate sets, I took the higher road and left them on the shelf. Sigh. Plus, there was only three and everyone knows you need enough to seat at least four. If there had been four, I don't know if I could have passed them up. $6.99 at TJ Maxx is way better than $32.95 retail, right? Here I am, several hours later and still kind of sad that I don't have them. Apparently I have a thing for pretty housewares.

The final thing I wanted to tell you about, dear Internet, is that Brandon and I are artists! A few weeks ago we made Inspiration Boards via a challenge posted on my friend Melanie's super cute blog. Since I had been feeling a little blah, I took the challenge. Brandon couldn't resist the fun and got in on it, too. Here is what we did...look closely at Brandon's. He's very proud of it and is a little bitter he didn't win (although I know he would have been sorely disappointed by the prize). I just thought it was fun and got a kick of seeing a picture of something I made on someone else's blog.

OK...was that long enough for you? Apparently I am chatty Cathy tonight. xoxo...

A Little Bit of This and a Little Bit of That

So here we are...half way through November! October ended with a very anticlimactic Halloween. This time, we were the big fat party poopers and didn't do anything. That is pretty much sacrilegious in my family, but when you don't have kids, missed the church Halloween party the weekend before, live in a secured condominium building, and had a really stressful week at work, a non-eventful holiday is just what happens (and is just the ticket).

A few days before Halloween though, we did make some sugar cookies. Given Brandon's current affinity for all things Batman, he pretty much only made bat-shaped cookies and incessantly spoke his (in)famous Batman voice. If you look really closely at the picture below, you'll notice that Brandon spelled "Batman" in Nerds. You'll also notice his hideous mustache (that is no longer a part of our lives).

I know you are thinking that Gingerbread shaped cookies aren't Halloween appropriate--I had visions of making Frankenstein-esque figures, but when it came down to it, I didn't have the dedication (or interest) to get all technical with special frosting techniques and equipment so we just made demented Gingerbread peeps instead.

The cookies were soft and incredibly delish--so thank you Wantanabe fam for the recipe. They probably will never see this blog but you know, you gotta give credit where credit is due.

What else? The past few weeks have been filled with lots and lots of work, lots and lots of church stuff, and lots and lots of thinking about stuff that sometimes make you want to go crazy. In addition to all of that gunk, Brandon has been putting together stuff to make himself a savvy applicant for a pharmacy residency and I have begun an exciting new project called Working Out. It is very new to me and I'm not quite sure how to do it, but apparently I have to go to a place called The Gym, move my body, and maybe even sweat. I hear that it can do wonders, but they also said that about Clear Pepsi.

On a totally unrelated note, I was browsing the world wide web today and saw that my cousins have also begun an exciting new project--They totally made shirts for the Twilight movie. Check them out here. I haven't read the last book yet and actually don't feel a strong urge to, BUT, I will be seeing the movie*. Twilight is just one of those very guilty pleasures. It is cheap story-telling that is mushy, almost embarrassing, and a tad over the top, but I've always had a thing for vampires. Remember? (BTW, I NEVER got that video. Lame!). Plus that whole forbidden love thing is kind of catchy. I'm Team Jacob though, so I'm not sure I can totally commit to a shirt.

That's about all I have to share...we are going to Orlando at the beginning of December to explore the many pharmacy residency options. So if anyone has ever been to Orlando, tell us whether or not it is worth going to Disney World or any of the other over-priced theme parks in the area. Any other suggestions of what to do while we are there are also welcome.

*PS, all Denver friends that want to see the above mentioned movie, let's make plans!!

What Else Would I Write About?

I'm sure you'll all be surprised to learn that this post will be dedicated to updating you on my current facial hair format. I recently trimmed down my beard and its very moustachey core is all that remains. You'll also be surprised to learn that Alison hates it. I also think that it's very ugly; but since I feel like we need this experience right now, I'll be rocking a creepy moustache for a week or so.

With my moustache, I really mind myself of that German guy in Raiders of the Lost Ark who gives Indiana Jones a beating and then gets chopped up in a plane's propeller. Here's a refresher if you need it (I actually recommend re-watching it even if you remember it well because it's so awesome):


Now that you've seen the movie, let's compare:

My moustache doesn't always have to be fierce and intimidating. Here's my moustache looking cute like a puppy:

The Vote Didn't Even Have a Chance to Get Barracked

So I got this video in my email today and I'm pretty sure it was from my dad. A lot of people have probably seen this but it was new to me and sure caught me off guard and made me laugh. Especially the part when the old lady swears and you read "Alison=Loser" in spray paint. FYI, we really aren't a political household so just enjoy the video for the laughs and don't think I'm trying to brainwash our small blog following into voting blue.



Not much else is going on in our neck of the woods. Between work, church, and a few chances to see friends, we are kept busier than we would like and come home very tired at the end of the day.

Fortunately, we are splurging this weekend and treating ourselves to some much needed R&R in the mountains. Just the two of us, a plush hotel (gotta love Priceline), cable TV, and a beautiful view. We will certainly enjoy ourselves and may or may not post pictures of our small trip.

Leave us to the Mountains

Hello Internet. I can't type much because I have a papercut on my middle finger and it hurts. Luckily, the pictures in this post do enough talking that I don't have to provide any witty narration.

A few weekends ago, Brandon and I ventured into the lovely mountains with our friends Duke and Morghan. While it was a rather wet and cold afternoon, the leaves were marvelous. Don't you agree??
As we searched for a place to set up our picnic, we found these silly meese. Duke and I sat in awe as our spouses spent about ten mintues making moose calls. Not only were we impressed with the Grammy worthy quality of the calls, but we were also surprised to learn that our spouses had such an affinity for getting these mangey animals' attention. They must have liked us because the meese ran off when another car pulled up. Brandon was so excited to be out in the fresh air, amongst the meese, the rain, the leaves, and the rainbows that were gracing us with their presence, that he acted a bit crazed. Or intoxicated. Or just giddy. Or like a nine year old cub scout that might get to play in the gym after the activity. I haven't figured out which best described him, but I think you get the idea. Luckily, Duke and Morghan are such good friends that I don't get embarrassed when Brandon gets like this... I know, I know, I can be wound rather tightly. I'm working on it! Regardless, it was a very pleasant afternoon. Everywhere we turned was just another beautiful sight.
If we are still in Denver next fall and you want to join in on the fun, we will take you to this gorgeous destination and show you what Colorado is all about.

Convictions

There are things we have in life called Convictions. The thing about them, however, is that you feel them more than you can explain them. My Convictions tend to be beliefs that I don't know all the facts about and/or have a pretty significant someone in my life who disagrees with them 100%. Yet for whatever reason, I just know in my heart of hearts that I am Right so we do them anyway.

I have many Convictions. For instance, I have a Conviction that ground beef is gross. While I have my reasons, there are plenty of good arguments to counter them. But no matter what, I will always think about Fast Food Nation which helped me solidify my deep Conviction that ground beef is gross. My mind will not be changed.

Also, I have a Conviction that LOST is the greatest TV show ever. Yes, better than The Office or Arrested Development or even The Hills. Again, I'm not going to be able to explain this belief in such a way that you will be convinced...I just know in my heart of hearts that LOST really is the best show ever.

So, you get the idea about convictions, right? You just believe them and would feel like a soul-liar if you acted to the contrary.

Well, another one of my Convictions is recycling. Brandon doesn't buy that it is important and always brings up a few annoying facts that I don't really know how to dispute...and to be honest, since recycling is a Conviction and I know I'm right, I no longer argue the issue. We just recycle and that's how it goes. Plus Brandon knows I'll fish the cereal box out of the garbage and he takes pity on me.

Unfortunately, our apartment complex doesn't have city recycling so this means that I have to do it all by myself. And I promise, I'm not writing this so I sound all noble and like I am the Green Queen...I'm not. I have never seen An Inconvenient Truth and I pretty much hate Whole Foods.

I am writing about this because even though I have a really strong Recycling Conviction, I am really bad at it. Here is my case in point:

The reusable junk just piles up and I do NOTHING about it. I'm paralyzed, see. I let it accumulate in the little recycling niche I created and then don't want to do anything about it because it will take two trips to bring it all down to my car and who wants to take that sort of time out of their day when they could be selling their soul to Facebutt? And, I can't ask for help because that just begs for a debate on recycling which I'm not going to get into--Conviction, remember??

Even when I get all industrious and take it out to my car, I still have to find a place to drop it off. Usually I just sneak it into someone else's recycling bin in some alley way, but I get nervous about being caught. I hope that if I ever do get caught, I'll be praised for going through such great lengths to recyle, but people can be lame like that. Plus, let's be honest. I'm always in a hurry to be somewhere and forget about stuff that isn't pressing pretty much as soon as possible.

What actually ends up happening is that I let the pile grow until it essentially spreads across our whole existence and then I take it down to my car and drive around for about two weeks with a trunk of newspaper and salsa containers until I spot a place that will safely get my recyclables to the Magic Place that makes sour cream containers and diet coke twelve packs into something pretty, preferably ponies with pink bows.

Sometimes people comes over before I have a chance to take care of the recycling embarrassment and it turns into this frantic moment of "Quick, Company is coming and they CAN'T KNOW I'm a messy, terrible recycler! We have to hide it!!" So, if you ever come visit, (do not) check out the balcony or our bedroom to look for stashed piles plastics, glass, and paper. I'll pretend to not know what you are talking about.

Poor Brandon just puts up with it. He has never said anything except this one ever-so-gentle comment like "Maybe we should just always keep the recyling on the balcony?" And while that was a great idea and we might just do that in the future, the pile was too massive at the time to want to move it to the balcony. And so it sat, accumlating more and more jelly jars and bean cans. In fact, that is where we are at this very moment. Except that picture was taken a few weeks so that pile has grown substantially (I did take *one* load down to my car).

One day we'll move into a real house and I'll have that purple bin with the lovely arrows on it to put my objects that need to go to the Magic Place and I'll be able to live my Convictions with grace and cleanliness. You just wait. In the mean time, pat Brandon on the back and tell him that he does a great job putting up with his wife's Convictions. And then maybe give him something with ground beef in it for dinner.

Let's Pretend it's 1986

A few weekends ago we had the surprise opportunity to go to a Poison concert. Brandon was helping some people move out of an apartment when a random person offered him 20 tickets to a Poison concert. How could he refuse? He took seven of them and we tried to find other people to come but everyone was a big fat party pooper and so we went alone.

It was awesome.

Brandon was so excited that he wanted to wear his black pleather pants. I initially said no but then was like "Sure, go for it." Because really, when else is it totally appropriate to wear black pleather pants? Unless it is Halloween, the answer is never. He eventually decided against them, based on the grounds that he didn't have the right shoes. I give him credit for a least wanting to dress up. He would have made a fine groupie if I do say so myself. I'll get him the shoes for Christmas, I promise.

I'll admit that when we first showed up at the venue, I was a little freaked. There were sooo many people that looked like this

I had no idea that an entire outdoor amphitheater of people still liked to live the dream of an 80s hair butt-rock band. Apparently, I was just grossly out of touch.

I'll also admit that when the first band got on stage, I had this moment of: "There's no way I'm going to make it all night. This is quite possibly the worst music I've ever heard, and this includes my brother's 7th grade band concerts." The band's name was Dokken and this is what they looked like:

When they started to play, I visibly winced and then realized I could get beat up for being such a hater and then discreetly plugged my ears by making it seem like I was just cold. It only helped a little bit because in case you don't remember, music at concerts is real real loud. In between songs, Dokken described themselves of as being a little more heavy metal than Poison and kept screaming into the microphone, "LET'S PRETEND IT'S 1986!!" They then screamed several strings of expletives and burst into the most spine-numbing guitar riffs you've ever heard. I was like, "Um, I'm not going to pretend that it is 1986 because that was 22 years ago and I was six years old. And can you just stop that thing you're doing with the guitar because that's just plain terrible."

Eventually Dokken finished their set and Poison took the stage. Of course there was a good thirty minutes between bands where I did plenty of people-watching. This was another thing I had to do discreetly. I also said a little prayer that the people in front of us wouldn't get into an all-out brawl and break beer bottles over each other's heads while knocking me over. Luckily the prayer was heard and one of the guys stomped his way out of the crowd so that everyone could go back to smoking their cigarettes and groping their partners.

I have to admit another thing. I only know two Poison songs--Every Rose Has its Thorns and Talk Dirty to Me. And unfortunately, I was only recently introduced to the second song by a Scrubs episode. But luckily my lack of knowledge didn't get in the way of me having a great time. They were fun and definitely had way more appeal than Dokken, largely because of the killer dance moves and pyrotechnics. I did a little head banging, shook some tooshie, and even wished I had some authentic memories of the good ol' days back in 1986.

In case you are ignorant like I once was, I present to you Poison, Talk Dirty to Me (the song sounds way more inappropriate than it really is, I promise. No bad or dirty words). Please enjoy the purple leather jackets, green guitars, crazy hair, and wish you were there with us.

1998

A few weekends ago Brandon and I went to Arizona for my...drum roll.... ten year high school reunion. Wow. I feel really old and don't like admitting that I have been out of high school for that long but was glad I made the effort to go. Brandon was the champ of the century and went to all the reunion events, without ever complaining or giving me the vibe that he wanted to leave. I think he later said that it was more boring than he expected; I don't doubt that it was a tad miserable for him but it was nice to have him there with me. I enjoyed showing him off and introducing him to people that I have known for so long.

The official reunion events were rather dull, I don't want to say too much because I know someone put a lot of effort into them. Needless to say, I was grateful I made an effort to see all the people I really cared about in more intimate settings where we could really catch up and enjoy one another.

While I didn't take too many pictures, here are a few: These are most of my good friends at a pre-party. Look what a fabulous looking crew we are!

All the girls! I got to know many of them through JV softball. We were such misfits and I think we had way more fun than most other high school athletes because of it. Our poor coach cried on several occasions because we were too busy doing cartwheels in the outfield or complaining about running too much to actually get very good. Some of my best memories of high school come from that team.

It is amazing because even though I haven't spoken to many those people in years, being with them was refreshing and way funner than I expected. It made me wish I lived nearer to them. There are several other people I got to reconnect with that I didn't manage to photograph and I think those people know who they are. I was in awe at all the amazing things my friends have accomplished and was certainly inspired by the people they have become. Hopefully now that relationships have been reestablished we'll remain in better contact as the years continue to fly by...

Here's a pic of Beth and I...we go way back. Hi sweetie! ;) There were several years where we were joined at the hip. It all started in Mr. Sensibar's history class where our incessant giggles permitted us to get away with way too much. Then there was an infamous geometry notebook that we passed back and forth all year and filled with our juicy gossip. I wonder where that thing is. At the end of our sophomore year, we threw a "Bethonal" end of the year pool party (Get it, Beth and Al (everyone in Tucson calls me Al), but it a sophomore chemistry class format? We thought we were so clever.). From then on, people referred to us as Bethonal, like we were one person. We loved it. From then on, times just got better...we went on a joint date to the Junior Prom, worked as hostesses at the Outback Steakhouse together, and even studied abroad in Mexico together for a short spell. Now we talk on the phone about once a month and the love is still there. It was great to see her; it had been way too long.

Luckily high school was a good experience for me. I obviously met great people, formed lasting relationships, and managed to squeeze in quite a few good times. All of that makes it a bit easier to admit that I am old and growing more and more un-hip each day. Of course, truly enjoying where I am in my own life probably makes the biggest difference, but that's quite a different story. xoxo!!

So I Can Go to Bed

1.) Tomorrow morning we leave to spend a few days in Tucson. I am going to of course visit my family, but I will see several friends that are very near and dear to my heart even despite the fact that I have not seen several of them for many many years. I am excited to exchange stories, take pictures, introduce them to Brandon, and gossip (in the best way of course) about others that we know. It should also be nice to visit Tucson, even though that city is still in the thick of summer. In many ways, I still consider Tucson home and always praise it when I can.

2.) I can't sleep. Whenever we have to get up early to catch a plane, my mind gets filled with all the billions of things I want to make sure I remember in the morning. My mind always paces with minutiae like "I didn't grab deodorant so I need to remember to pack that" or "I should take out the garbage so it doesn't stink when we get home" or "Should I pack another pair of flip flops?" I always debate, too, whether or not I should just get up and complete my to-do list but always decide to stay put and try to get my body at least start to relax. So here I am, in a relaxed position, only allowing myself to write for ten more minutes...just to get all these thoughts out so I can hopefully catch a few hours of nite-nite.

3.) Brandon worked a 14-hour day today. He has been dreading it for a while now and made it all the way through without a complaint. I appreciate that he works a few nights a week in addition to all his school work. He's the best even though he sometimes does hideous things with his facial hair.

4.) The DNC just wrapped up in our mile-high city. Unfortunately, I didn't get to see one lick of it. Is that lame or what? I was talking about this amongst friends tonight and someone put it perfectly, "It's like there's this big party three miles away that is off limits to us. There's no way they'd let us in anywhere and even if there was a hope, would it be worth the traffic? And where would we park?" So true. I at least wanted to see the tents, police in riot gear, and catch a celeb or two, preferably The Boss or maybe George Clooney. Oh well. That's what Real Life (aka a full time job) does to you, I suppose. Makes you less spontaneous and overly practical.

5.) The link to the blog where I write about my work is here. I don't write on it a ton and haven't learned how to keep my posts short and sweet. My job could be pretty consuming so this is where I tease it out so I can leave it behind. I write about learning the ropes, feeling the responsibility of my job, and wanting to actually make a difference. It might be a big fat bore to a lot of people, so this is your warning.

6.) My ten minutes are up. xoxo

A Couple Pics

Last Saturday, Alison and I biked out to the Cherry Creek Reservoir. Here's a picture of us and our human-powered hogs. The trip ended up being about 25 miles in length, which set new couple and personal records for us. Also, I believe that we biked farther than Michael Phelps did last week, which is something to be proud of.

I've decided to honor this soon-to-be-defunct handlebar moustache with a name. He shall be known as "El Stāche" (yes, pronounced with the long "a"). It would be wise not to make eye contact when looking at El Stāche because you will likely become weak in the knees and become overcome with a desire to submit your will to El Stāche's. Excuse another Lord of the Rings reference, but El Stāche is the closest thing to the eye of Sauron outside of Middle Earth. Also, El Stāche might steal your soul.

This is a completely accurate depiction of Alison's relationship with El Stāche. She hates him with her whole soul (which she has managed to retain despite El Stāche's constant presence) and wishes for his speedy demise.

A Few Items

Today has been a tremendous day for me in many ways, which I would like to share with you.

1. My fantasy baseball team exited the basement for the first time in many months--and we did it with style. I woke up to find a 5.5 point gain to rocket me from a solid 10th place to 9th and only 1 point out of 8th. This was a major moral victory for me. I've wanted it for a long time.

2. I'm super psyched about the Olympics. You can watch a different sport every half-hour or so. Plus, every fraction of a second of action is crucially important to these people. I realized that this is amazing. I can only relate it to March Madness because you can pick it up at any moment, but it's hard to put down. The Olympics have the potential to provide constant competitive stimulation. You can pull for someone you've never even heard of and if they lose you just move on to the next event which is likely to be equally as hard-core as the one before.

3. Seeing President Bush attending the Olympics has confirmed the fact that I have developed a solid man-crush on him. You can say what you want about the decisions he has made as president. I disagree with many of them myself. I just think that we could be really good buddies because he looks like he knows how to have a good time. Plus, don't you think that if he did some cameos in movies or hosted Saturday Night Live that he would be hilarious? I do. He cracks me up just watching him watch stuff.

4. You may have noticed a wave of manfulness radiating out of Denver this morning. The reason is that the handlebar moustache went into effect at 9:30 am. The handlebar moustache is the climax of my usual facial hair cycle. Scientific studies have shown that I get maximum facial hair splendor with the handlebars as graphed below.

5. I love the Batman voice. I want to master it so that I can really intimidate deadbeats into giving me information while remaining anonymous. Some people think that the Batman voice is over the top. I think that it is entirely appropriate and very impressive. I hope they make several more Batman movies and then someone edits out all of the Batman-voiced lines and compiles them into an album that I can listen to in the morning to get psyched up. Batman is freaking awesome.

Facebutt

Brandon and I recently sold our souls to the World Wide Internet and became social networkers via Facebook.

(For all intensive purposes, I am calling this site Facebutt. I had a dear dear friend in college (Hi Anderma!) that taught me the trick of inserting immature words into the names of common corporations/institutions. It works best if the name is also a compound word so you can just substitute one of the words with the immature word. The word "butt" is my favorite one to do this with. Every now and I then I throw out a Buttbuster or a Buttmart into the conversation and it makes me roll with laughter, even if it is only on the inside. Normally, that sort of trick is in Brandon's domain, but for some reason, this one's mine and I'm holding on tight. For a while, I toyed with the idea of calling Facebook, Buttface...it is still very tempting, but it doesn't stay true to the original word).

So Facebook. We resisted for such a long time, knowing full well that it is just another way to waste time on the Internet and ignore real face-to-face relationships. I dipped my toe into the water first, mostly because I have this scary thing coming up at the end of August that I don't really want to talk about because it involves the phrase 10 year and high school all in the same sentence. Anyways, I had been thinking more and more about this scary thing (which is a also known as a full blown anxiety attack) and decided I would find people I cared about before the dreaded event to determine the extent that I wanted to sign up for it.

Once I got on Facebutt, we spent an hour one evening looking up all of Brandon's friends and then he too decided that he should sell his soul. A few evenings later we were sitting next to each other on our sofa, our laptops on our laps, Facebutting together (romantic, eh?). We were kind of enjoying seeing pictures of old friends while also kind of feeling like our Precious Time was just floating out the window.

When we finished, Brandon visited his regular sites (an evening ritual for the both of us) and coincidentally, this article/jab popped up. It nailed everything that had been running through my mind about the essence of Facebutt. Please read it, you will laugh (especially if you've been on Facebutt).

I will no longer talk about my clothes on our blog

I'm kind of embarrassed that my last post was about my outfit for the day. Where did that come from?? We are going out of town for a few days...starting in oh, about four hours (I NEED TO GO TO BED) and I felt compelled to do something to move that last post from the top of our silly page. I mean, what if we die on the way to the airport tomorrow and that post about my clothes are the words that people remember me by, only because they were just so darn accessible? Hopefully this one will have a little more dignity than the last. No promises.

As I've thought about the lowness of that last post, I've been thinking about blogging. "Is this lame?" I think. After that thought, I always think, "Yes." Then I wonder, "Is there anything I really should be writing about?" and "Why do we even do this in the first place?". I think of all that crap about my posterity and am not quite convinced our future kids will care about how their parents made Gandalf jokes back in the day. Yet at the same time, I actually really like the process of writing these entries and will probably keep doing them*. Obviously, I haven't really come to any conclusions, but my inner-monologue was heightened when my aunt** forwarded me a link to this blog that essentially mocks other blogs. I got a huge kick out of it but felt a little pathetic afterwards.

All I know is that since we have this blog, I feel compelled to write, even when I have nothing to say. So that morning when I had that unfortunate discovery about my shirt, I guess some passion stirred inside me and I had something to say and by gosh, I was going to say it. I learned however, that maybe I should just pick up the phone or say it to myself. So sorry about that. I'll try to use a little more discretion next time. Again, no promises.




*I even started another blog about my work as a family therapist. Why? Why? Why?

**(sorry I haven't written you back dear Shelley, I appreciated your emails and will get back to you after we return from CA)

Do You Know What Sucks?

Reaching for your favorite shirt and discovering it has a yucky stain on it. Probably from leaving a chapstick in a pocket during the dry cycle. HUGE BUMMER.

In case you were wondering, that happened to me just now. I'm suriving OK. Settled on a plain grey v-neck, some new jeans, and these cute black flip flops I've been wearing all summer.

Life is good, just busy...hopefully some posts will follow. We go to California on Saturday for some consumption of skin-cancer and trans-fats. It's going to rock our worlds.

This weekend...

I tried Flamin' Hot Cheetos for the first time. I have felt compelled to eat them for a while now...all the kids I work with LOVE them and I've been curious about their fluorescent red tint. Brandon picked them up when he bought snacks for our hike on Saturday.

I do want to clarify that they were the Flamin' Hot Cheetos con Limon variation. That whole Flamin' Hot franchise wouldn't be worth eating at all if they didn't have the con Limon option. That citrus-y kick at the end eases the burning which then makes me less worried about their overall toxicity.

I was impressed with how truly flamin' hot they were as well as how badly they stain your fingertips. When you eat them, you have to look into the bag to find the exact one you want and then delicately pick it out. If you don't, you're entire hand will be this powdery red mess that could destroy anything and everything.

The first one I ate made me grimace and swear to never eat another, although within about two minutes I felt brave enough to try another and then another...then on the way home from the mountains I ate several more, almost enjoying them.

The jury is still out as to whether or not I will eat them again. I have a feeling that if they are in front of me I'll have a handful but doubt I will ever intentionally seek them out. Any Flamin' Hot experiences to share?

Once

My dad has been gushing about this movie, Once. Every time we talk he asks if I've seen it yet and when I say I haven't, he says, "Put it in your queue Alison, I promise--you will love it. Watch it." We finally watched it last weekend and I quickly understood why he loved it so...it's mostly about music and a little about love. For those of you that do not know my dad, he is about the sweetest and most loving person out there---AND---he secretly wishes he could be a famous musician.

My dad was right, I loved it. The story is really simple and Brandon thought it was a glorified music video (it kind of was). But at the bottom of the simplicity and behind the great music is a sweet story.

The movie is over a year old so I am way behind the times, but I just had to write about it because hopefully it will get me to stop thinking about it. I have that personality...I fall in love with something, become slightly obsessed with it, and run it into the ground. The film is rated R for a lot of f-bombs, so there are several of you who won't ever see it. Here is a scene so you can at least get a taste of the sweetness. I think I've watched it on youtube every morning this week as I ate breakfast. The scene really is just a music video, but the producer's reponse as well as the song make it worth it to me every time.

Graduation

I know this is late, but Alison's graduation was a major event for us. She's now a/the Master of Social Work. She's actually my favorite one ever. I'm very proud of her and all her hard work. Enjoy a couple pictures of the glorious occasion.

2.7 Miles High

Alison's parents and brother were in town last weekend for her graduation which was awesome. After all of the ceremonies, we all decided to get high. No-not on drugs. That's actually impossible now because one of Alison's many degrees is from D.A.R.E. We actually hiked to the top of one of Colorado's famed "14ers" named Mt. Evans. It was an easy hike for us because we're all in really good shape. It only took 10-15 minutes to hike to the top.

Mt. Evans is the tallest mountain in the world. As a consequence, the top was very cold and windy. I was nearly blown off of a very steep cliff. I would have gone Gandalf on everyone and become a white wizard, but that fire-whip didn't come up and grab me. While I was holding on for my life, Alison decided to snap a photo. I'm glad she didn't have to scream "Nooooooo!" like Frodo did.

It all turned out cool in the end for everyone....

...except Gandalf.

It would be irresponsible to talk about Gandalf without mentioning this one--a classic.

One Year!

It is true. We've been married for 365 days. Actually, this year was a leap year, so I guess it has been 366 days.

It hasn't been perfect...I completed my master's degree and was quite a bear as deadlines approached and there was that one time we thought we had bed bugs (we didn't) and we did have a really really rainy trip to Yellowstone...but all in all, it has been a GREAT year for both of us. As we move into new chapters of life, it is a joy to do it with each other. Believe it or not, I think I am developing a lovely appreciation for the way Brandon always makes people laugh and Brandon has learned a trick or two about me along the way. We have a comfy home, high aspirations for our future, a growing list of things we've proudly accomplished together, and at the end of the day, we still get a kick out of snuggling on the couch to watch youtube videos or LOST together.

I can't wait for all the things that are to come. Here's to one year ago....